Into the Twilight

Today

2009-08-09T19:59:00.000-07:00

Since no one actually reads this but me I figured I would have some fun :D

This for some reason happens to be one of my favorite songs. I've never actually heard it performed or heard a recording but I learned it from my mom as she played it on her guitar. If for no other reason that has made is special to me.

Today, while the blossoms still cling to the vine
Ill taste your strawberries, Ill drink your sweet wine
A million tomorrows shall all pass away
ere I forget all the joy that is mine, today

Ill be a dandy, and Ill be a rover
Youll know who I am by the songs that I sing
Ill feast at your table, Ill sleep in your clover
Who cares what the morrow shall bring

Today, while the blossoms still cling to the vine
Ill taste your strawberries, Ill drink your sweet wine
A million tomorrows shall all pass away
ere I forget all the joy that is mine, today

I cant be contented with yesterdays glory
I cant live on promises winter to spring
Today is my moment, now is my story
Ill laugh and Ill cry and Ill sing

Today, while the blossoms still cling to the vine
Ill taste your strawberries, Ill drink your sweet wine
A million tomorrows shall all pass away
ere I forget all the joy that is mine, today

The Experiment

2009-08-03T21:56:00.001-07:00

I have *gasped* turned off Facebook. I have deleted the bookmark, removed the short cut, and hidden the app. I have determined that for a month I will not check on Jericho (my virtual puppy) I will not stock random people whom I’m not even sure I’ve meet, I will not live in fear of seeing an update that will effect my emotionally, I will not check my Facebook 10 times a day to see if I got a new message.

I will, however, miss knowing what is going on in my friends’ lives. Perhaps I will actually have to email them or even scarier call them. Heaven forbid I use the countless stacks of stationary I have to actually write a real letter. Well actually with out Facebook to ask for their addresses how would I actually write them?!? Who has an actual address book with anything other than emails any more? Maybe it is time to get one.

I am most importantly going to be studying. But please don’t let that deter you from messaging me, emailing me, texting me, or even, yes writing me.

High maintenance, High yield

2009-08-03T21:33:00.000-07:00

It took me a long time to be ok with the fact that I am high maintenance. Don’t get me wrong; as per most things in my life I don’t do it the usual way. I don’t require hours to get ready. I can go days with out a shower and as long as I got a bucket I’ve been known to go a month without running water. I love camping and hiking and it wasn’t until college that I learned to put on make up. Heck I still wonder if I am doing it right some times.

However, I need attention. Not the, hey every body look at me, attention. The, there is someone somewhere thinking about me, attention. I don’t need to be special to many but I do need to be special to a few. I need to be held and touched. Not constantly, but there is something to being able to curl up at the end of the hard day in the arms of someone who loves you.

I don’t need fancy meals or big bouquets of flowers. But I do need thought and energy put into something for it to be special. I do take time and energy to maintain. I will need words of encouragement when it feels like my life is tumbling around me and I will need hugs at the end of a long day.

In the end though I am also high yield. I am loyal to a fault and relatively quick to forgive. The support I’ll give through out the relationship will sustain most through the hardest times.

And the love? I will love in ways most people only imagine about and then take it to a level most will never obtain. I am not afraid to give all in order reach places unknown. I challenge people to look at their way of life and give them reason to grow and together we will grow and write a story that is incredible. For I, I am a Proverbs 31 woman and I will dress my family in scarlet!

Magnetic Poetry

2009-05-31T22:14:00.001-07:00

Entwine the beauty of the rhythm
With the passion of the embrace
Caress the depth of the soul
While exploring the hunger for life
Bathe in the whispered sun light
And Squeeze the music out of the moon
Hunt for the song in a flickering flame
And find the voice of the eternal dance
But most of all make my heart smile

Hope

2009-05-30T15:44:00.001-07:00

The tears I cry like the rain from the sky
Only serve to make me wonder why
I’ve cried these before pushed them out the door
Why do they serve to haunt me more?
The clouds fill my heart will the storm ever part
When does the sun breaking through begin to start?
The storm continues still slowly breaking down my will
I pray that all my hope it cannot kill
Though the water does this it serves to assist
It waters the seeds that the devastation missed
So when it is done and out comes the sun
The flowers of hope will blossom one by one

Flowers

2009-05-30T15:35:00.000-07:00

A planted flower stuck neatly in its pot
sheltered and cared for neatly in its spot
Is that what lasting relationship are built on or not?
Let us be a columbine so brave and yet so fair
let us survive the elements the altitude and wear
In the struggle to survive come strength and care
Melding into one what was once a pair

Wretched Heart

2009-05-30T15:29:00.000-07:00

Oh wretched heart why do you ache
Were not your sorrows the tears to take?
Oh racking sob why shake my soul
Have not my pain paid this toll?
Oh tear filled eye why do you leak
I thought this story was no longer bleak
Oh wondering hope where have you gone
You’ve taken the music out of my song
Oh peace of God why elude me still
I have found myself losing will
Oh laughter why do you fade so fast
I thought these tears would not last
Oh broken spirit why fail me now
When under this load I find I bow
Oh arms of shelter where’s my embrace
Where are the hands to dry my face?
Oh words of comfort upon deaf ear
As I am crushed by what I fear

I feel that now I come near my end
I fear there’s nothing beyond this bend
But once again I lift my face to you
And cry for mercy to see me through
For I know you’re there if I only reach
Though I don’t understand the lesson you teach
Please Dear God mend my aching heart
Bring to whole what is now in part
And give strength, this new day to start.
Please give your peace to my tiered heart.

Start of Into the Twilight

2008-12-12T18:09:00.000-08:00

I thought I would start this off with the title piece written just for you. As well as included some of my previous poems.

Into the Twilight

The quite mind upon the edge the slippery slope below
The teeter of the consciousness back and forth so slow
A simple nudge to topple down to the darkness beyond
Even the smallest pebble causing the rippling pond

If so fragile the mental state, how much more the heart
For it’s been shattered countless times into each tiny part
Yet each time the pieces of the heart do manage to mend
Careful love and soft still voice and gentle hands that tend

The darkness the waits below always seems closer still
As the heart mends and heals and bends to another will
For in the end again it’s broke as it crashes to the floor
And another nudge pushes the mind towards twilight’s door

Begin

2008-12-12T18:04:00.000-08:00

This dance I dance was meant for two
The music started with out you
I looked around through out the call
Surrounded by people, couples all
The music played beat after beat
I wondered if I should take a seat
But instead I lifted my head up tall

And began to Dance

Hope

2008-12-12T18:03:00.000-08:00

The falling sun dips behind the hills
My restless heart for a moment stills
The pink the orange slip into Gold
As my weary soul feels too old
The beauty found with in this sight
Is just enough, to keep my hope a flight

Love

2008-12-12T18:00:00.000-08:00

Ache for the beautiful pleasure
Entwine together naked passions
Find a tantalizing fire
Touch between love and fantasy
Drench the fever under delicious forever
Caress at an eternal magnificent depth
Celebrate paradise in the soul
Linger near the sacred kiss
Embrace your ocean of rhythm
Bathe fully in sweet whispers
Dance through glistening moonlight
Cherish time with a wild heart
Promise me love

Half of Me

2008-12-12T17:55:00.000-08:00

Empty words flail about in my brain
Chasing in and our the meaning the same

I feel as a half not as a while
It feels I am missing part of my soul

Not quite torn out but neither is it there

Try to smile and pretend that I am ok
Say the right words so that it looks that way

Dry eyes to the world wet behind my door
Heart wrenching sobs that shake to my core

Not quite torn out but neither is it there

Brother

2008-12-12T17:47:00.000-08:00

Oh little boy where have you gone?
I could not find you at your pond.
I looked up the tree you use to climb
And in the fort where you hid from time
I looked in the meadow where you use to play
And down the alley's and up the way
I even looked where a boy becomes Man
For I knew that was in your plan
I finally found you but I was too late
For the man-boy I found said "war wont wait"
So I hugged you and shead my tear
As you left to go fight all I fear
Thank you for loving me enough to leave
I only hope our lessons and laughter will be all you need
Oh little boy where have you gone?
Please remember you'll always be my son.

Flame

2008-12-12T17:44:00.000-08:00

The flickering flame slow to die
Yet holding on without the why

It's not lack of care that brings it to its rest
But the lack of substance to allow it to burn it's best

The flickering flame once did burn bright
Now it holds to life with all its might

I guess its simply its time, time to let it go
But its true end point only it will know

The flickering flame slow to die
I hope through it all you found your why

Causual Words

2008-12-12T17:41:00.000-08:00

The emptiness and pain inside left by what you said
I don't know if it was meant as so or if its all in my head

A casual laugh is a glancing blow to the timid me inside
My tough exterior a for facade for the aggrieved me I hide

11/3/07 Once again

2008-12-12T17:34:00.000-08:00

I ache for sweet whispers entwined with love
I yearn for the adoration merged with reverence

Where have they gone?

Did you not once feel desire
Did you not one feel the magnetism
Many promises sworn to the forever
Now lie in the never only forever in forgotten

In the depth do they not linger?
I now hunger for the remembrance of the lost
I now search for the dying embers